Thoughts, Unsettling

Creative Thoughts: “Dome of Atlantis”

2010-04-08T22:47:00.001-07:00

The sky bled silent crimson,
its gradual blackness impaling us upon the words spoken.

"The Isle, it sinks!"

I am lost, and cold.
The blood drips upon the walls, in thickness, and in ichor, always closing in.
Always enclosing on me…
I am scared.

The thunder is distant, and oh so ominous.
But I feel it shake the ground beneath me.
The Blood still runs…
The blackness threatens me now.
I am scared.

"The Isle has been pulled beneath!"
What is this?

Something profound has just happened.

-Author’s Note: A random brain musing that wouldn't leave my head, until explored. A rather vivid picture, and mood, and atmosphere, that I simply needed to write.

Flickr Tags: Creative Thoughts,Poetry,Atlantis,Muse,Avant Garde,Blood

Why Fan Crushes Seriously Anger Me

2010-04-08T14:51:00.001-07:00

It is not uncommon to find beautiful people on the silver screen, and on like media, where beauty is usually what is being sold more so than the proposed medium. It is not uncommon to find many who would find themselves attracted to such people. Perhaps even be enamoured by them. Though it is often such an attraction to their character, as opposed to their person; as often the characters are perfect portrayals of what we want to see, perfectly represented archetypical people who are the very thing of our desire in a mate; without flaw, without reservation.

This, often in the innocent fashion that it occurs, it more or less harmless. A thing giggle or joke worthy while with friends. A simple informal, whimsical infatuation: Just as the term would suggest, a fan ‘crush’.

However, there comes a time where such things become more than simple crushes. Where, in some instances, such a relationship becomes plausible in the mind of the fan. Where there even comes a point of obsession. Case in point: the millions of teenagers practically worshiping Edward and Jacob of the (completely overrated, and downright idiotic) Twilight saga; or the millions of girls throwing themselves at the Jonas Brothers. I dare not repeat some of the horror stories that I have heard regarding such situations.

So, why do I care? Why is it that I would even acknowledge such people who stoop to such ridiculous levels of irrationality, of stupidity, of… well downright insanity? Why would I pay attention to such a thing?

In my experience, most, for at least one occurrence their lifetime, exhibit such a crush. And in my experience, all areas of their life are affected by this quasi-obsession. They begin to measure and compare all things and relationships to their respective crush, and make decisions around it. This concerns me, when I in turn need then to live up to impossible, fictional standards.

In the specific area of women, and my future wife, this offers some serious psychological predispositions towards me, even if on a subconscious level. And that thought angers me. That I would be placed in a position where I am made to believe that I need to measure up; to be that beautiful, that suave, that sensitive, that well spoken, that rich to even vie for the affections of women.

And that is why I grow infuriated with the idea of a fan crush.

Flickr Tags: Crush,Fan,Anger,Rant

Simple Thoughts: Want and Desire

2010-04-05T15:16:00.001-07:00

To desire, is not necessarily to want. In Freudian terms, desire would fall under the category of the "id", where it is of a nature that is purely existing. It is unhampered by reason, or thought; it simply is. To want, is to filter desire through these processes, and ultimately reach a final choice of outcome: I may desire to indulge in certain musics, but I do not want to.

Flickr Tags: Simple Thoughts,Want,Desire,Definition

Simple Thoughts: The Mind…

2010-04-03T14:02:00.001-07:00

It is often found, at least to my perspective, how perfectly predicable, and completely fickle the mind is. It would seem that inconsistency is the only true constant, and yet… One can always see the the approaching outcome. I do often wonder why mine takes me to the places it does; and for that, I love, and hate it both.

It is here where I wonder to what end, to what purpose, does mine find the paths, negative. And so frequently it often seems. Here, then do I decide and declare to shake them. I am free.

For choice… is a constant of a different nature. Hence their paradoxical co-existence is then plausible. And it is within the realm of choice, that I choose to resist; to leave such pitfalls behind. To choose peace, and abundant life; fulfillment, and joy that I find in Christ Jesus.

Here I choose to resist the workings of my fleshly mind, and the workings of he who use its influence to rule over my state of being. No. I am indeed free.

“His death, my life. This is now, more than ever my war. His death, my life. This blood was shed for something. His death, my life.” - Lee Richards

Flickr Tags: Simple Thoughts,Mind,Choice,Constant,Inconsistency,Unpredictability,Flesh,Resistance,Lee Richards

The Social Deception of Synonymy of Logic, and Reason

2010-03-16T04:04:00.001-07:00

Words have meaning.

This is the basic construct for all language. However, those words are not static in their definition, uses, and purpose; especially in the English language. Case in point: the word ‘Gay’. The dictionary definition of this work, until perhaps ten to fifteen years ago, was joyous or happy; chipper; carefree. Today its meaning has shifted to define a homosexual male, or homosexuality altogether. It has evolved still further in its slang and derogatory insinuations, to mean stupid and/or unfair, among many other things.

This same principle of fluidity of word meaning can be applied to my topic here, today: The social definition of logic has mutated to be understood basically as what I would call reason. My problem with this definition is that it takes away any word to describe what logic truly is.

A reason is something that explains, or justifies. The cold hard facts, as it were. Quantifiable, irrefutable constants, and evidence. “I dropped a penny, and the force of gravity upon it caused it to fall to the ground.” This is a function of reason. When you begin to try to quantify *why* the penny was dropped, it becomes more complicated. The quantifiable evidence: It was done on purpose (I stated my intention of dropping the penny, before I did so). There was no ultimate benefit from this action (the only end result, was that I was one cent poorer). Reason would not compute, because according to the constants, 2+2 is equating 0. It has been dubbed ‘illogical’.

To call something illogical, generally implies that ‘A’ cannot compute to ‘B’; that there is no causality to have the former produce the latter. That there is no string of reason (or facts) to link the two. If I decide to unexpectedly puncture the tire on my car, and there is no string of reason, or facts to explain why this has happened, it is deemed illogical. However, it is. There is always logic to every action under the sun.

Logic, then, is the process by which we receive stimuli, process them, choose how to react, and do so. A form of causality that extends beyond the physical, and takes into account mental processes, if you will. These stimuli do not necessarily need to be reasonable. Emotional responses and influences, I would argue, are logical, and contribute a great deal to the logic process.

If the sum of stimuli received are equal to the numerical value 10 (with the different stimuli being 4, 5, and 1), the mental process 2, choice 1 (for the sake of simplification of the example, choice being a binary of 0 or 1), and the end reaction X, a representation may look something like this:

((4+5+1)x2)^1=X

X=20

X will always equal 20, if all the factors are the same. This result would be duplicable, if all the factors were exactly the same. Emotion is very difficult to replicate exactly, which is why it is rare for even the same person to react exactly the same way to stimuli twice. There is also the factoring in of experience and learning, that renders this nearly impossible. Were the exact same mind to encounter the exact same situation, in the exact same way, in the exact same mental state, the end result would be identical. Were they not, one of the factors would vary (for example, the mental process equals 3), and the end result differs greatly.

Emotion and feeling are a large part of the mental process, and decision making. To continue, then with my proposed story: I slash my own tires. It makes no sense to an outside viewer, and serves no reasonable purpose. However, I did it because I was angry, and in a violent temperament. The stimuli of this anger, accompanied with an object that I would be able to damage without infringing upon anyone else, and therefore avoiding severe repercussion, is evaluated by my mind; here is weighed against the violent temperament, and need for release of mental pressure. The choice, then becomes to lash out and transfer mental stress, into physical violence as a proverbial release valve. The end action results.

There is a string of logic, here. An explanation, a causality. There is always cause, and effect. Whenever we cannot see the relationship, we have failed to take into consideration all the factors. Whether they are *reasonable* or not. Reason does not dictate relevance.

Logic is a constant.

Flickr Tags: Logic,Reason,Deception,Constant,Definition,Decisions,Process,Choice